A village: that won’t give up, give out or give in

It has already been two weeks since I was crowned Miss UNC and I still cannot believe that it happened. But I do know, that had it not been for MY God and the people that surrounded me left and right, I would have given up --- multiple times. I  find it so interesting how even in moments of the most certainty, fear still finds a ways to seep into our pores and just...sit..there. My journey to Miss UNC helped me to realize that fear was truly the enemy of progress when it almost lead me to drop out of the running...twice.

For one, I had always had so much respect for the women that had served in that capacity. As a matter of fact, the first and second Black Miss UNC’s were women of my organization ( Alpha Kappa Alpha, The Theta Pi Chapter)  so if for nothing else, there was a legacy that needed to be upheld. However even from the jump, I allowed fear to intimidate me and I started to search for validations for my fear. I thought I did not know enough people. I told myself I did not have enough time and I even convinced myself that my platform would not appeal to many people...but God always comes in right on time with that clap back for any self-imposed mental setback.

I finally decided that I would run for Miss UNC because despite of all my fear and doubt, I did believe that #SoarSzn was something that e v e r y student at UNC could benefit from. Furthermore, I would have been a hypocrite if I was preaching that we should soar beyond our fears, while allowing mine to dictate my decisions. However, even after I committed, I battled with doubt. Prior to submitting my application, I asked Jonathan and Renee if they really thought I should do it and they both has a snarky response as if I should have know that they had no doubt that I was indeed cut out for it. So I ultimately submitted my application and the devil got to work. During the very first round, I incorrectly created a signatures collection system that was not Board of Election acceptable and at 84/200 signatures, I had to start all over again. At this point, I was ready to take my seat because I literally could not. But as always, I had Jon, Melissa and Embee telling me “you legit have a week, you will be fine..” I will be fine. I will be fine.

And they were right because I met the signature threshold and my name was on the ballot. At this point, I should have known that the devil would try to fight harder-- it is always in the moments where we are closest to our breakthrough, that the devil pushes his hardest---and he pushed heavy--with doubt. There was one night in particular where I texted my Line Sister and Campaign Manager, Renee, and told her I thought it was best that I drop out the running. She said NO. So I kept going.

Though there were many times that I felt inadequate, there was a day that solidified that I would finish strong. It was a couple days after I found out I had lead the first round of voting when my 7 year-old brother, BJ, called me and asked “have you won yet..?” I told him I still had over a week before I found out and he replied with” oh, I am not worried. You will win.” They always say that God uses the words of those around you to bless you and man, this was exactly what I needed.

The words of my seven year-old-brother, the words of Jon, the words of Renee, the words of my undefeated campaign team, the words (and votes, haaaaan) of the Black Voice, the words of Garrett, the words of Michael, the words of Squad2x,  the words of Theta Pi sisters, the words of my coworkers, the words of Jasmine J, the words of my classmates in Kenan-Flagler, the words of MY family...these words were what kept me going when I wanted to throw in the towel.

Through this win, I have been reminded time and time again, that it takes a village. Any great feat requires a village. We can not do anything alone and I am just so blessed to have witnessed that MY village is one that won’t give up, give out or give in. For whatever your goals, dreams, or ambitions may be, always remember to thank your village for holding you up in moments when you could not hold yourself up and for encouraging you to go one more lap.

To my village, from the very bottom of my heart, THANK YOU. I could not and would not be half the woman that I am without each one of you.